Nox Amicus

My work this lunar cycle has been reflection – taking some time to think about where the rest of the work this year has taken me. A lot of that is revisiting things I’d done that were successful, as well as assessing where I might have done things differently.

Last night during the full moon I dreamt that I was attending a reunion of my ex-girlfriends and crushes. Talk about ample opportunity to see things you’d done that might have hurt people… But as much as I was expecting judgement and retribution, I was largely ignored during the reunion.

I tend to hold on too long to things I believe I’ve done wrong – but that doesn’t mean everyone does. Healing involves letting go of the pain – which is even more important if we’re the ones causing the pain to persist.

I’ve been singing this song with the band for a few months now – but I always struggled with the motivation. I don’t want to prevent a partner or someone in my life from changing and growing – I always want them to be their best selves. Coming off of last night’s full moon though – I found something deep in myself that I hadn’t felt in about 7-8 years. Suddenly the lyric “I found a love I had lost” makes perfect sense.

We shouldn’t need to change for one another, nor should we need others to change for us. We are all beautiful and flawed and perfect. If we can meet in that space – and embrace the perfect love and trust with and for one another – that’s where the magic happens.